The Pastor was preoccupied with
thoughts of how he was going ask
the congregation ...
to come up with
money for the repairs of their
church building. Therefore, he
was annoyed to find that the
regular organist was sick and a
substitute had been brought in
at the last minute. The
substitute wanted to know what
"Here’s a copy of the
service" he said impatiently, "but
you’ll have to think of
something to play after I make
the announcement about finances."
During the service, the minister
paused and said, ”Brothers & Sisters,
we are in great difficulty, the
repairs cost twice as much as we
expected, and we need more.
Any of you who can pledge $1000
or more, please stand up.
At that moment, the substitute
played, “The Star Spangled Banner”
The substitute immediately
became became the regular organist!
Elaine, Emmitsburg, MD.
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Jokes, My Little
Reasons Riding is Better
- You don't have to sneak your riding
magazines into the house.
- If you are having trouble with riding,
it's perfectly acceptable to pay a professional to show you how
to improve your technique.
- The Ten Commandments don't say anything
- If your trainer takes pictures or
videotapes of you riding, you don't have to worry about them
showing up on the Internet when you become famous.
- Your horse won't keep asking questions
about other horses you've ridden.
- It's perfectly respectable to ride a
horse you've never met before, just once, or, ride many horses
in the same day, whether you know them or not.
- When you see a really good horse, you
don't have to feel guilty about imagining riding him.
- If your regular horse isn't available,
he/she won't object if you ride another horse.
- Nobody will ever tell you that you can
go blind if you ride by yourself.
- When dealing with a riding trainer, you
never have to wonder if they are really an undercover cop.
- You don't have to go to a sleazy shop
in a seedy neighborhood to buy riding stuff.
- You can have a riding calendar on your
wall at the office, tell riding jokes and invite co-workers to
ride with you without getting sued for harassment.
- There's no such thing as a Riding
- If you want to watch horses on
television, you don't have to subscribe to a premium cable
channel (but you might need a video tape).
- You don't have to be a newlywed to plan
a vacation primarily for the enjoyment of riding.
Submitted by Dick, Williamsport, Md.
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List of Horse Jokes,
- What do you call two Mexicans playing
basketball? Juan on Juan
- What is the difference between a Harley
and a Hoover? The position of the dirt bag.
- Why is divorce so expensive? Because
it's worth it.
- What do attorneys use for birth
control? Their personalities.
- What did the blonde say when she found
out she was pregnant? Are you sure it's mine?"
- Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."
- Why do drivers' education classes in
Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and
Fridays? Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses
Submitted by Bill, Narberth, PA.
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Why Men Shouldn't Baby-sit . ..
18th Humor Page