On a tour of Texas, the Pope took
a couple of days off to visit the coast for some sightseeing.
He was cruising along the
beach in the Pope-Mobile when there was a frantic commotion just
off shore. A helpless man, wearing a Black & Silver Raiderís
jersey, was struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws
of a 25-foot shark. As the Pope watched, horrified, a speedboat
came racing up with three men wearing Denver Bronco's jerseys. One
quickly fired a harpoon into the sharks' side. The other two
reached out and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Raider fan from
the water. Then using long clubs, the three beat the shark to
death and hauled it, too, into the boat. Immediately, the Pope
shouted and summoned them to the beach.
- "I give you my blessing for your brave
actions," he said. "I have been told about there being bad blood
between Broncos and Raider's but now I have seen with my own
eyes that this is not true."
- As the Pope drove off, the harpooner
asked his buddies "Who was that?"
- "It was the Pope", one replied. "He is
in direct contact with God and has access to all of God's
- "Well," the harpooner said, "he may
have access to God's wisdom, but he doesn't know jack about
shark fishing. Is the bait holding up O.K., or do we need to get
Submitted by Dick,
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Sports Jokes, My Little
Subject: Little old lady
George the preacher, in his Sunday sermon,
used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a long sermon,
he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies. About
half held up their hands.
Not satisfied he ranted and raved for
another twenty minutes and repeated his question. This time he
received a response of about 80 percent. Still dissatisfied, he
lectured for another 15 minutes and repeated his question. With
all thoughts now on Sunday dinner, all responded except one
elderly lady in the rear.
"Mrs. Jones, why are you not willing to
forgive your enemies?" "I don't have any." "Mrs. Jones, that is
very unusual. How old are you?" "Ninety-three." "Mrs. Jones,
please come down in front and tell the congregation how a person
can live to be ninety-three, and not have an enemy in the world."
The little sweetheart of a lady tottered
down the aisle, very slowly turned around and said: "It's easy ...
I just outlived them all
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About Aging, My Little
Now that's refreshing