Here is a very simple little test comprising of four questions to determine the level of your intellect.
Your replies must be
spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating or wasting time.
- You are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in second place. In which position are you now?
Answer: If you answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. You overtook the second runner and took their place,
therefore you're coming second.
For the next question try not to be so dim.
- If you overtake the last runner, what position are you now in?
Answer: If you answered second-last, once again you're completely wrong. Think about it...How can you over take the person coming last?
If you're behind them then they can't be last. The answer is impossible!! It would appear that thinking is not one of your strong points.
You would make a good weak link!!!
Anyway, here's another to try, don't take any notes or use a calculator, and remember your replies must be instantaneous. Take heart!!
- Take 1000. Add 40. Add another 1000. Add 30. 1000 again. Plus 20. Plus 1000. And plus 10. What is the total?
Answer: 5000??? Wrong again!!!! The correct answer is 4100. Try again with a good calculator. Today is clearly not your day!! Although
you should manage to get the last question right...
- Marie's father has five daughters:
Question: What is the fifth daughter's name? Think quickly...you'll find the answer below...
Answer: Chuchu??? WRONG! It's obviously Marie! Read the question properly!
You are clearly the weakest link....GOODBYE!
Submitted by Larry, from WVNU FM
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WD-40. It's just not for rusted bolts ...
- WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a LITTLE on live bait or lures and you will be catching the big one in no time. Also
it's a lot cheaper than the chemical attractants that are made for just that purpose. Keep in mind though, using some chemical laced baits
or lures for fishing are not allowed in some states.
- Use it for fire ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately, and stops the itch.
- WD-40 is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray on the mark and wipe with a clean rag.
- Also, if you've discovered that your teenage daughter has washed and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of
laundry, saturate the lipstick spots with WD-40 and re-wash. Presto! Lipstick is gone!
- If you sprayed WD-40 on the distributor cap, it would displace the moisture and allow the car to start.
- Wd-40, long known for its ability to remove left-over tape mung (sticky label tape), is also a lovely perfume and
air freshener! Sprayed liberally on every hinge in the house, it leaves that distinctive clean fresh scent for up to two days!
- Seriously though, it removes black scuff marks from the kitchen floor! Use WD-40 for those nasty tar and scuff
marks on flooring. It doesn't seem to harm the finish and you won't have to scrub nearly as hard to get them off. Just remember to open some
windows if you have a lot of marks.
- Bug guts will eat away the finish on your car if not removed quickly! Use WD-40!
It's important to know all this stuff.
Submitted by Dave, Bolder, Co.
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A married couple is driving along a highway doing sixty mph, the wife behind the wheel.
Her husband suddenly looks over at her and says, "Honey, I know we've been married for twenty years, but I want a
divorce." The wife says nothing but slowly increases speed to seventy mph.
He then says, "I don't want you to try to talk me out of it, because I've been having an affair with your best friend,
and she's a better lover than you are." Again the wife stays quiet but speeds up as her anger increases.
"I want the house," he insists, pressing his luck. Again the wife speeds up, to eighty mph. He says, "I want the car,
too," but she just drives faster and faster.
By now she's up to ninety mph. "All right," he says, "I want the bank accounts, and all the credit cards, too." The wife
slowly starts to veer toward a bridge overpass piling. This makes him a bit nervous, so he says, "Isn't there anything you want?"
The wife says, "No, I've got everything I need." "Oh, really," he says, "so what have you got?" Right before they slam
into the wall at a hundred mph, the wife smiles and says, "The airbag."
Submitted by Bill, Narberth, Pa.
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Jokes About Marriage, My Little
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