Humor Selections for March 31st, 2006

     My Little Sister's Jokes > Recent Addition List

New jokes posted on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Happily maintained  by the Community of Emmitsburg, MD.

Help us build our joke and story bank.
E-mail us at:

A man and woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.

Their waitress, taking an order at a table a few steps away, suddenly

noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman acted unconcerned.

The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.

Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared.

After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table."

The woman calmly looked up at her and said, "No he didn't. He just walked in the door."

Submitted by Kenneth, Shropshire, England

Return to: Top of Page, List of Jokes About Marriage, My Little Sister's Jokes,

A US Navy cruiser anchored in the Mississippi for a week's shore leave.

The first evening, the ship's Captain received the following note from the wife of a wealthy plantation owner:

"Dear Captain, Thursday will be my daughter Melinda's Debutante Ball. I would like you to send four well mannered, handsome, unmarried officers in their formal dress uniforms to attend the dance. They should arrive promptly at 8:00 PM prepared for an evening of polite Southern conversation. They should be excellent dancers, as they will be the escorts of lovely refined young ladies. One last point: No Jews Please."

At precisely 8:00 PM on Thursday, Melinda's mother heard a polite rap at the door which she opened to find, in full dress uniform, four handsome, smiling black officers. Her mouth fell open, but pulling herself together, she stammered: "There must be some mistake."

"No, Madam," said the first officer "Captain Goldberg never makes mistakes."

Submitted by Bill, Gettysburg, Pa.

Return to: Top of Page, List of Un-Categorizable Jokes, My Little Sister's Jokes,

 What Car Company Names Really Mean


  • Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
  • Always Unsafe Designs Implemented
  • All Un-informed Drivers Insulted
  • All Unnecessary Devices Installed


  • Big Money Works
  • Bought My Wife
  • Brutal Money Waster


  • Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer


  • Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time


  • Dumb Old Dirty Gas Eater
  • Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere


  • Fix Or Repair Daily
  • Found On Road, Dead
  • Fast Only Rolling Downhill


  • General Maintenance


  • Garage Man's Companion


  • Had One Never Did Again
  • Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else.
  • Hated Old Noisy Damaged Auto


  • Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive?


  • Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along


  • Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Every day.
  • Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment


  • Send Another Automobile Back


  • Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto


  • Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object


  • Virtually Worthless

Also Submitted by Kenneth, Shropshire, England

Return to: Top of Page, List of Humorous Sayings, My Little Sister's Jokes,

Warmth of a Horse

When your day seems out of balance
And so many things go wrong.
When people fight around you,
And the day drags on so long...

When parents act like children
In-Laws make you think "Divorce,"
Go out into your pasture...
Wrap your arms around your horse.

His gentle breath enfolds you,
As he watches with those eyes...
He may not have a Ph.D.,
But he is oh, so wise!

His head rests on your shoulder
You embrace him good and tight;
He puts your world in balance,
And makes it seem all right.

Your tears will soon stop flowing,
The tension is now eased.
The garbage has been lifted
You'll be quiet and at peace.

So when you need the balance
From circumstances in your day
The best therapy you can seek-
Is out there chomping hay!

~Author unknown

Submitted by Audrey, Emmitsburg, Md.

Return to: Top of PageList of Horse Jokes, My Little Sister's Jokes,

The Ultimate DWI stop ... download video

Return to: Top of Page, List of Audio/Videos, My Little Sister's Jokes,

Why dad's don't get to pick their kids tee-shirts ...


Submitted by Patty, Ringos, NJ.

Return to: Top of Page, List of Photos, My Little Sister's Jokes,

March 29th Humor Page