Humor Additions for September 20th 2004


    My Little Sister's Jokes > Recent Addition List

New jokes posted on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Happily maintained  by the Community of Emmitsburg, MD.

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E-mail us at: humor@emmitsburg.net


A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Naples, Florida.

She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way.... but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking for the highly prized shoes.

After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle on prices" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes at a decent price!"

The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, "Little lady, y'all just go and give it a try, why don'cha!"

The blonde turned on her heel and headed out toward the swamps, determined to catch herself an alligator. Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he pulls over to the side of the levee where he spots that same young woman standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he spots a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning speed, she takes aim, kills the creature and, with a great deal of effort, hauls it onto the slimy swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.

The shopkeeper stands on the bank and watches this scenario in amazed silence.

Just then, the blonde struggles and flips the gator on its back. Then, rolling her eyes heaven-ward and screaming in great frustration, she shouts out, "Damn, this one is barefoot, too!"

Submitted by Bill, Narberth, Pa.
 

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A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve ...

... frolicking in the Garden of Eden.

"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British."

"Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French."

"No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. They are Russian."

Submitted by Dave, Bolder Co.

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Cat litter cake recipe

Here is a recipe for the next time any of us have to take dessert to a gathering. Hope you all get the pix at the bottom.

Want to have fun at a party? Prepare this recipe and watch your friends FACES !! *note: this cake contains absolutely nothing that is not edible!!*

On a recent visit to our veterinarian to get shots for our cat I found this recipe on the waiting room bulletin board. After recovering from hysterical laughter, I obtained a copy from the office staff so that my wife could make it, which she refused to do. I took it to work and gave the recipe to a lady at work who loves cats. The pictures below show the results of her work, it looks like a real litter box but it's actually quite tasty, so I decided to pass it along.

Cake Ingredients:

  • 1 box spice or German chocolate cake mix
  • 1 box of white cake mix
  • 1 package white sandwich cookies
  • 1 large package vanilla instant pudding mix
  • A few drops green food coloring
  • 12 small Tootsie Rolls or equivalent

Serving "dishes and utensils"

  • 1 new cat-litter box
  • 1 new cat-litter box liner
  • 1 new pooper scooper

Prepare and bake cake mixes, according to directions, in any size pan. Prepare pudding and chill. Crumble cookies in small batches in blender or food processor.  Add a few drops of green food coloring to 1 cup of cookie crumbs.  Mix with a fork or shake in a jar. Set aside.

When cakes are at room temperature, crumble them into a large bowl. Toss with half of the remaining cookie crumbs and enough pudding to make the mixture moist but not soggy. Place liner in litter box and pour in mixture.

Unwrap 3 Tootsie Rolls and heat in a microwave until soft and pliable. Shape the blunt ends into slightly curved points. Repeat with three more rolls. Bury the rolls decoratively in the cake mixture. Sprinkle remaining white cookie crumbs over the mixture, then scatter green crumbs lightly over top.

Heat 5 more Tootsie Rolls until almost melted. Scrape them on top of the cake and sprinkle with crumbs from the litter box. Heat the remaining Tootsie Roll until pliable and hang it over the edge of the box. Place box on a sheet of newspaper and serve with scooper.

Enjoy!

Submitted by Don, Hagerstown, Md.

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