A young blonde was on vacation in the
depths of Naples, Florida.
She wanted to take home a pair of genuine
alligator shoes in the worst way.... but was very reluctant to pay
the high prices the local vendors were asking for the highly
After becoming very frustrated with the
"no haggle on prices" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the
blonde shouted, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my
own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes at a decent price!"
The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing
smile, "Little lady, y'all just go and give it a try, why don'cha!"
The blonde turned on her heel and headed
out toward the swamps, determined to catch herself an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he pulls over
to the side of the levee where he spots that same young woman
standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he spots a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward
her. With lightning speed, she takes aim, kills the creature and,
with a great deal of effort, hauls it onto the slimy swamp bank.
Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.
The shopkeeper stands on the bank and
watches this scenario in amazed silence.
Just then, the blonde struggles and flips
the gator on its back. Then, rolling her eyes heaven-ward and
screaming in great frustration, she shouts out, "Damn, this one is
Submitted by Bill, Narberth, Pa.
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A Briton, a Frenchman and a
Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve ...
... frolicking in the Garden of
"Look at their reserve, their
calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British."
"Nonsense," the Frenchman
disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are
"No clothes, no shelter," the
Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're
being told this is paradise. They are Russian."
Submitted by Dave, Bolder Co.
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Un-Categorizable Jokes, My Little
Cat litter cake recipe
Here is a recipe for the next time any of
us have to take dessert to a gathering. Hope you all get the pix
at the bottom.
Want to have fun at a party? Prepare this
recipe and watch your friends FACES !! *note: this cake contains
absolutely nothing that is not edible!!*
On a recent visit to our veterinarian to
get shots for our cat I found this recipe on the waiting room
bulletin board. After recovering from hysterical laughter, I
obtained a copy from the office staff so that my wife could make
it, which she refused to do. I took it to work and gave the recipe
to a lady at work who loves cats. The pictures below show the
results of her work, it looks like a real litter box but it's
actually quite tasty, so I decided to pass it along.
- 1 box spice or German chocolate cake
- 1 box of white cake mix
- 1 package white sandwich cookies
- 1 large package vanilla instant pudding
- A few drops green food coloring
- 12 small Tootsie Rolls or equivalent
Serving "dishes and utensils"
- 1 new cat-litter box
- 1 new cat-litter box liner
- 1 new pooper scooper
Prepare and bake cake mixes, according to
directions, in any size pan. Prepare pudding and chill. Crumble
cookies in small batches in blender or food processor. Add a
few drops of green food coloring to 1 cup of cookie crumbs.
Mix with a fork or shake in a jar. Set aside.
When cakes are at room temperature,
crumble them into a large bowl. Toss with half of the remaining
cookie crumbs and enough pudding to make the mixture moist but not
soggy. Place liner in litter box and pour in mixture.
Unwrap 3 Tootsie Rolls and heat in a
microwave until soft and pliable. Shape the blunt ends into
slightly curved points. Repeat with three more rolls. Bury the
rolls decoratively in the cake mixture. Sprinkle remaining white
cookie crumbs over the mixture, then scatter green crumbs lightly
Heat 5 more Tootsie Rolls until almost
melted. Scrape them on top of the cake and sprinkle with crumbs
from the litter box. Heat the remaining Tootsie Roll until pliable
and hang it over the edge of the box. Place box on a sheet of
newspaper and serve with scooper.
Submitted by Don,
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