Walmart customers soon will be
able to sample a new discount item ... Walmart wine.
The world's largest retail
chain is teaming up with E&J GalloWinery of Modesto, California,
to produce the spirits at an affordable price, in the $2 - $5
range. While wine connoisseurs may not be too inclined to throw a
bottle of Wal-Mart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is
a market for cheap wine, said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing
at Roger Williams University in Bristol, R.I. She said: "The right
name is important."
So, here we go: The top 12 suggested names
for Wal-Mart Wine:
12. Chateau Traileur Parc
11. White Trashfindel
10. Big Red Gulp
9. Grape Expectations
8. Chateau Ghetto
6. Chef Boyardeaux
5. Peanut Noir
4. Chateau des Moines
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. World Championship Riesling
And the number 1 name for Wal-Mart Wine. .
1. Nasti Spumante
Submitted by Don, Hagerstown, Md.
Once upon a time, God was missing
for six days.
Eventually, Michael, the
archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day.
He inquired of God. "Where have you been?"
God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction,
and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look, Michael.
Look what I've made."
Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and
said, "What is it?"
"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've
put Life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a
great place of balance."
"Balance?" inquired Michael, still
God explained, pointing to different parts
of earth. "For example, northern Europe will be a place of great
opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going to be poor.
Over there I've placed a continent of white people, and over there
is a continent of black people."
"Balance in all things," God continued
pointing to different countries.
"This one will be extremely hot, while
this one will be very cold and covered in ice."
The Archangel, impressed by God's work,
then pointed to a land mass and said, "What's that one?"
"Ah," said God "That's Washington State,
the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful streams,
hills, and forests. The people from Washington State are going to
be handsome, modest, intelligent and humorous, and they are going
to be found traveling the world. They will be extremely sociable,
hardworking, high achieving, and they will be known throughout the
world as diplomats, and carriers of peace."
Michael gasped in wonder and admiration,
but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there
would be balance."
God smiled, "There is another
Washington...wait til you see the idiots I put there."
Submitted by Jon, Emmitsburg, Md.