Humor Additions for Wednesday, Feb 5th


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On a tour through America, president George Bush visits a school to explain his policies.

After that he invites the children to ask him questions.

Little Bob starts: "Mr. President, I have three questions:

  1. How did you win the elections despite the fact that you had fewer votes than your opponent?
  2. Why do you want to attack Iraq without any reason?
  3. Don't you think that the Hiroshima bomb was the biggest terrorist act in history?"

In this moment the bell rings, so all the children run out of the classroom. After they come back from their pause, president Bush invites them again to ask some questions.

Now Joey starts to ask: "Mr. President, I have five questions:

  1. How did you win the elections despite the fact that you had fewer votes than your opponent?
  2. Why do you want to attack Iraq without any reason?
  3. Don't you think that the Hiroshima bomb was the biggest terrorist act in history?
  4. Why did the bell ring 20 minutes earlier today?
  5. Where is Bob?"

 

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The Sunday School teacher was telling her 4 year old class how important the bible is...

 "Your mommies and daddies get a lot of their knowledge and wisdom from the bible. It is a very important book." Then, she asked the class, "If someone were to offer you a gift of a bible or a fishing pole, which would you choose?"

"Fishing pole, fishing pole!" they all cheered.

Then the teacher asked my daughter, "Olivia, why would you choose a fishing pole over a bible?" She answered, "I would choose a fishing pole because then me and God could go fishing together!"

Submitted by Christine Howard
 

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A True Story, as Told by the Driver at His First AA Meeting.....

A man goes to a party and has too much to drink. His friends plead with him to let them take him home. He says no that he only lives a mile away. About five blocks from the party, the police pull him over for weaving and ask him to get out of the car and walk the line. Just as he starts, the police radio blares out a notice of a robbery taking place in a house just a block away. The police tell the party animal to stay put, they will be right back and they hop a fence and run down the street to the robbery.

The guy waits and waits and finally decides to drive home. When he gets home, he tells his wife he is going to bed and to tell anyone who might come looking for him that he has the flu and has been in bed all day.

A few hours later the police knock on the door. They ask if Mr. X is there and his wife says yes. They ask to see him and she replies that he is in bed with the flu and has been so all day.

The police have his driver's license. They ask to see his car and she asks why. They insist on seeing his car so she takes them to the garage and opens the door where they find the police car, lights still flashing.
 

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Feb 3rd Humor Page