Humor Additions for Monday, Sept 9


    My Little Sister's Jokes > Recent Addition List 

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A blonde girl comes back from school one evening ...

She runs to her mum and says: "Mummy today at school we learnt how to count. Well, all the other girls only counted to 5, but listen to me: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10! It's good, innit?"

"Yes, darling, very good." Answers the mom.

"Is that because I'm blonde?" she asks.

"Yes, darling, it's because you're blonde." The mom says.

Next day, the little girl comes back from school and says: "Mummy, today at school we learnt the alphabet. All the other girls only went as far as D, but listen to me: A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K! It's good, innit?"

"Yes, darling, very good." Answers the mom.

"Is that because I'm blonde, mummy?" she asks.

"Yes, darling it's because you're blonde." The mom says.

Next Day, she returns from school and cries: "Mummy, Iím the only one in the call that gets to stay out past midnight, while all the other girls have to be home by 8. "Is that because I'm blonde, mummy?"

"No darling, it's because you're 25."

Submitted by Barb, Unionville, Pa
 

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An Apology ...

Dear Tony,

I have been unable to sleep since I broke off your engagement to my daughter. Will you forgive and forget? I was much too sensitive about your mohawk, tattoo and pierced nose. I now realize that motorcycles aren't really that dangerous, and I really should not have reacted that way to the fact that you have never held a job. I am sure, too, that some other very nice people live under the bridge in the park.

Sure my daughter is only 18 and wants to marry you instead of going to Harvard on

full scholarship. After all, you can't learn everything about life from books. I sometimes forget how backward I can be. I was wrong. I was a fool.

I have now come to my senses, and you have my full blessing to marry my daughter.

Sincerely,

Your future father-in-law

P.S. Congratulations on winning the $100 million Super Lotto

Submitted by Kate, Charleston, SC.
 

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Discoveries ...

Man discovered weapons, invented hunting.
Woman discovered hunting, invented furs.

Man discovered colors, invented painting.
Woman discovered painting, invented make-up.

Man discovered speech, invented conversation.
Woman discovered conversation, invented gossip.

Man discovered agriculture, invented food.
Woman discovered food, invented diet.

Man discovered friendship, invented love.
Woman discovered love, invented marriage.

Man discovered woman, invented sex.
Woman discovered sex, invented headache.

Man discovered trade, invented money.
Woman discovered money, man was all screwed up after that.

Submitted by Bill, Narberth, Pa.
 

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